When I’m patiently waiting for someone to stage the perfect Instagram shot with ideal lighting and aesthetics, I’ll often say, “Take your time making fake memories!” While it’s a joke, it serves as a helpful reminder that not everything we see online is how it appears. In a world where perfection is just a scroll away, it’s easy to fall into the comparison trap. We get lost in endless scrolling, captivated by seemingly flawless lives. But the comparison doesn’t stop at social media; it creeps into our families, friendships, workplaces, lifestyles, and even churches.
At its best, comparison can motivate us to improve. But at its worst, comparison breeds envy or pride, shifting our focus away from God to the ways of the world. Comparison often stems from insecurity, where we fear we aren’t enough, or from pride, where we believe we’re superior. When we begin to desire or question someone else’s success, it often leads to thoughts like, “I want what they have.” or “Why did they get that?” This reveals a deeper heart issue: discontentment with what God has given us. When we compare, we tell God his gifts and plans for our lives aren’t enough. The apostle Paul warns that comparing ourselves to others is unwise (2 Corinthians 10:12). When we measure ourselves by earthly standards, we lose sight of our true purpose: fulfilling God’s unique plan for our lives.
As well as compromising our relationship with God, there is also the danger of comparison affecting how we relate to one another. In 1 Peter 4, Peter gives us instructions on how to live in community with one another. Instead of loving one another deeply, we may become resentful or jealous. Instead of using our gifts to serve one another, we might withhold them out of insecurity or pride. By constantly measuring ourselves against others, we miss the opportunity to offer hospitality, encourage, and build up the body of Christ.
comparison breeds envy or pride, shifting our focus away from God
So, how do we break free from the curse of comparison? The first step is to shift our focus back to God and understand our true identity in Christ. This identity is not defined by the successes or failures of those around us but by our relationship with Jesus, where we are loved, forgiven, and redeemed as children of God. Instead of measuring ourselves by others, we should ask: “How am I growing in my relationship with God? Am I faithfully stewarding the gifts he’s given me?” These questions help us evaluate ourselves through the lens of faithfulness to God rather than comparison with others.
Discontentment begins in the heart, where comparisons arise. We must ask God to reveal the root of our discontentment and help us find true contentment in him. When we fix our eyes on him, we find that he fulfils every longing. With the help of the Holy Spirit, we are empowered to resist the temptation of comparison and live joyfully in our true identity in Christ.
